Friday, October 21, 2016

Everything is Conditional




Just as the borderline perceives acceptance as conditional, so rejection can also be seen this way.  If I were only attractive enough, smart enough, rich or demanding enough I would get what I want. 

Adjusting to a world that is continually inconsistent and untrustworthy is a major problem for us.  Our universe lacks pattern and predictability.  Friends, jobs and skills cannot be relied upon.  I have to test and retest all of these aspects of my life; I am in constant fear that a trusted person or situation will change into the total opposite absolute betrayal.  Experience has taught me this is always a likely outcome.  A hero becomes the enemy; a perfect job becomes the bane of existence.  Our need for reassurance is insatiable.  We fear that support will be withdrawn the moment we cease to please.